The Invisible Work of Women

My dream was to breast-feed peacefully under a tree. I thought this was an easy thing, the baby came out and like in the garden of Eden you sit there nourishing your baby in all your womanly glory. Then the baby came, and the breast-feeding began. I couldn’t believe the first time my baby latched - it hurt like a hundred knifes in my chest. Breathing through tears I thought, this can’t be right. This is supposed to be the most natural thing in the world, and it does not feel natural or comfortable in the slightest.

Photo By Dawndra Budd

http://www.portraitsbydawndra.com/

Everyone said it is normal for the first few months to hurt a lot, cracked nipples, bleeding, it’s just a part of the process…not to mention blocked ducts which makes you feel like your breasts are on fire. Why haven’t I heard about all this before? Of course you hear about challenges in pregnancy, and the pain of labor, but very few people talk about how difficult breast-feeding can be. It is more than a full-time job and some of the hardest work you will ever do. I was determined to do it because of both the nutritional benefits, and the experience I wanted to have with my child. Within two months of hard work, lactation consultation, and understanding that our babe had a tongue tie - “the breast-feed pain-free under a tree" dream came true...but it was a journey. Pumping is an incredible option and yet also challenging and time consuming. I have the fortune of not having to work full time, and from home at the moment (and my husband had a three month paternity leave) but for all of those people that had a child and went straight back to work… I can only imagine the leaking breasts, hours of pumping at your desk, and storing little bags of breastmilk in the office fridge. It’s astounding what women have done for years to nourish our humanity. The biggest thing for me is that most of this tremendous work, this life-giving unbelievably important and powerful gift is invisible. Millions of women have done it over the years behind closed doors, under blankets, and hidden in private corners. I love breast-feeding now, it is an incredible and joyous thing and I plan to do it for as long as I can - but it is also a process.  I want to say to all the women out there who have been doing this for lifetimes - thank you for your work, not always seen but of the utmost importance, thank you for feeding our humanity with your body. And for those women who didn’t breast-feed, I honor you as well.  If it was difficult with supply, pain in latching, having to work and not being able to be with your baby, or any other reason - it is totally valid. I get it. We all have to make the best choice for ourselves and our child for how to nourish our baby, and either way, it is a tremendous task and often not seen or acknowledged.  Women,  I see you and thank you for your labor of love.