Dying to Live.

Finding something I'd die for has been entirely liberating...

it also happens to be the same thing I wake up and live for...

it's like the Costco of all personal meaning...and everyone loves a one stop stop.

Flatter me baby...

There's a big difference between being flattered and being loved...

Recently I had a chance to spend time with some very good friends of mine, people I know from when I was a kid, and I noticed something very unique about the time when I was with them. I felt totally and completely loved and adored but not flattered in the slightest. They laughed at me, gave me a hard time about all of my quirks, finished my sentences, and even put me in my place when I got out of line. It felt so good, so real, so true, and so loving. I realized living in LA I get flattered a lot. Told I am so amazing in some form or another, but very rarely am I called on my shortcomings...and believe me there are a lot of them...but usually it's because the love doesn't go that deep. There is nothing wrong with a genuine compliment, but many times a flattering statement is a way to also manipulate someone into getting them to do something you want them to do. Soo pay attention to the difference and make sure that your ego doesn't get sucked up into flattery disguised as love...there is nothing better then keeping it real.

Do not cross this line.

Boundaries. Set them. They are important. You can only be as good to other people as you are to yourself...and in the end other people will thank you for being honest and standing in truth.

I love to love, I love to care, I love to help, but I can only give to others what I have given to myself. We are all one. If someone is upset with you for setting certain boundaries then they will either have to grow up, or they will go away. Either way, the truth must be know to everyone and it will create a certain bar for the type of loving people and situations you want surrounding you. In the end remember you are not doing other people a favor by allowing them to hurt you in any fashion, for how we treat and relate to others is only a reflection of how we treat ourself

Follow that pattern!

Pay close attention to the patterns in your life...

They are like small finger prints showing you the key to the gates within.

If the same things keep happening to you over and over in your life then it might be worthy to recognize that the pattern is inside you, and changing the circumstances will not change the outcome.

If you love the patterns, great! If not, get things right within and the rest will easily fall into place.

Truth cuts like a knife.

Now and then I spend some time down on skid row working with homeless people. Skid row has the largest homeless population in LA and there is a wonderful group of people through The Jonah Project (www.jonahproject.org) that do amazing work and out reach down there...

I always try to take some time when I am there to really talk to some of the homeless people. I spoke to one homeless man for quite awhile, he was fairly quiet and unassuming, but was ready and willing to have a conversation when it was opened to him. We chatted in and out, and sometimes we would get interrupted by other people, and he would watch me try to be socially graceful and answer someones question, or hug someone when they went to say goodbye. I turned back to him and said "I'm sorry, what were you saying?", and he looked at me and said, "you know you look all nice and sweet and easy like, but really you tough as nails...but you know sometimes you play stupid, like you don't really know what's going on, and that ain't true. You smart, but you play stupid, and you know exactly what is going on, so don't play stupid." And when he said that to me, it cut right to my core, because I realized he was right.

Maybe it's a woman thing, maybe it's a me thing, maybe it's a not wanting to hurt other peoples feelings in certain situations. But, he called it, and he was dead on...and I think I have probably done that to make things easier, to avoid discomfort in others and therefore myself. I don' t think I will do that as much anymore, and maybe it takes a man who has lost everything, to realize he has nothing to loose by just calling it like he sees it. To him I offer a deep thank you.