DA BAIT

Beats by OP Beatz

Written and Performed by Simone Bruyere Fraser Camera Moderator Miles Jackson Forgette www.simonebruyerefraser.com www.opbeatz.com https://www.facebook.com/simonebruyer... https://soundcloud.com/simone-bruyere... @SimoneB_F https://www.linkedin.com/in/simonebf

Do you Open Doors?

 Many of us have heard of the phrase when one door closes another one always opens. It's that age-old saying that says when something doesn't work hopefully something better will come along and make it all worthwhile. There have been a lot of doors closing this last month, and everyone feels it. Jobs, travel, events, and plans made months ago are suddenly up in the air. It's a strange time, it’s a time of social isolation, quarantine, and general Unknowing. But maybe, if we turn our heads from the closing doors for just a moment we might see some unsuspecting opportunities greeting us.

In honor of my Grandmother
Georgiana Bruyere  

 I love spending time with elders, and during this time I have been spending even more time with them, in a quarantine safe sorta way. All of their doors are closed right now for their own health and safety. They're isolated even more than usual into their own rooms, houses, not allowed visitors, to go to church, and not able to go out in general. In the assisted living facility I visit I get to visit many people isolated in their apartments. I spend time with them I ask them how they're doing and a completely different world is opened up to me with every door that I open. Recently I have been able to ask them questions like in what moments in your life have you been the happiest, what makes you feel the most fulfilled, and what makes you feel the most loved. The answers pour out of them. I simply have to ask one question and 45 minutes later I’ve heard the most incredible response. It is quite possibly some of the richest and most fruitful time I have ever experienced in my life. What started out as the desire to be helpful when they needed extra hands, turned into me learning new meanings of life. Hanging on every word -  not able to breathe because I didn't want to disrupt the magic of the moment. Laughing so hard that I begin to cry, crying so hard that it became funny. War stories, love stories, sharing of art, travel, hobbies, you name it. We shared an emotional intimacy, even six feet apart, a special “I’ve got nothing to lose kind of candor” that we all save only for rare moments.

Every door I opened was a completely different world even though their circumstances are similar. Their internal world was completely different. Every door I opened felt like I was stepping into Narnia and I didn't know which book I was in. There are many ways to approach crises and I certainly don't know the answers, but I can tell you inside each of those doors the response and reaction was shockingly different. Sometimes when one door closes a hundred doors open, as literally was the case in my situation. I'm not saying it's easy, I'm not saying that I would like it to last forever for the elders especially, but I am saying perhaps I might look back at this time with fondness and as extremely valuable. A time when I was able to step into many different peoples worlds and gleam the most valuable wisdom of their existence. An extraordinary and unique gift that I will carry with me for the rest of my life. This is a difficult time for many, and I wish you and all of your loved ones peace, health, and happiness...and if any doors close in your life may a thousand new ones open.

. 

The Angry Lady Dance

The Dance of the Angry Lady is an Interesting Dance. A therapist once told me that I should spend more time examining my anger, primarily because I didn’t appear to have much.... however, at the same time the tension in my jaw was at a point where it would be so painful that it would put me flat out on my back, unable to speak. Over the years I slowly got in touch with my anger and the jaw tension melted away like snow in spring. Things, people, situations started to piss me off in appropriate and healthy moments when something wasn’t right for me...I found my boundaries in that agitation. When I found my boundaries I clearly and profoundly found myself in an entirely new way. I found the wall that says this is what I need, this is what works for me, and this is what doesn’t. I also learned how to love in a much more selfless and authentic fashion giving only when it felt true, and when I deeply wanted to give from my soul not because I needed to please anyone. Without boundaries we cannot truly love ourselves or others, and anger is the edge of knowing that boundary.

Photo By Allen Wyler

 Anger has been hard for women over the years, seen as unloving, Bitchy, unattractive...but anger aligned with knowing what does and doesn’t work for you is simply personal power. This year we celebrate 100 years of women having a right to vote, a right to have a voice. So On this International Women’s Day I encourage you to become curious about your anger, to feel when your walls are being breached, to use your voice to connect to your center and to love and express the truth within.

Are you content?

He kept saying to me, I feel so content. I thought about it. I felt the same way. It felt so good, like I was exactly where I wanted to be, spending time with people I love, doing things I love, and no place else in the world could be better. I felt it, what was this profound feeling of contentment? It felt better than being happy, it was like deep joy and deep peace came together and had a baby inside my soul. Named Contentment.

Photo by Miles Forgette

 I was aligned with the present moment and everyone and everything around me seemed to expand the feeling. It's a beautiful thing to feel, especially around the reflection of a New Year, we spend so much time reminiscing about the past or rushing towards the future contentment feels like a luxury. But, it's not. It's where we can live, contentment is a home base. Think of animals stretching out in a sun spot so content, or getting their back scratched in bliss, or simply thrilled we came home. Yes as human beings we will always be growing we will always have  new problems to solve. However, I was reminded that it's o.k. to be content, it fact it's more than ok, it's where we might enjoy living more often than not... and I for one felt so much gratitude to be living it so deeply. Wishing you and yours deepest contentment now in this New Year 2020, and always. With much love, Simone

Do you Control or Collaborate?

Life is full of twists and turns,  bends, and  unexpected surprises. Most of the time we don't see them coming. The question is do we control or collaborate with life when they do?


Last month I had a wonderful opportunity to work with  birds. I can't think of a better example of a time when I had to collaborate instead of control. You can't control what birds will do. My learning moment was when one exceptional vulture kept putting one arm out. It was a strange thing for a bird to do and it looked so unique. But instead of trying to control him I decided in that moment to collaborate and put my other arm out in the same form that he was putting his arm out. For me it was a glorious moment of collaboration  -  with an animal. I'm slowly learning to let go of my own needs and perceptions and listen to what life is giving me. I am an artist and so I almost always directly relate to art, but truly it is for anything in life. When you control you constrict and limit possibilities around you, you are afraid and you are not your fullest self. When you collaborate you are open, you're receptive and infinite possibilities come your way. I must acknowledge the photographer,  Dawndra Budd...her assistant, and everyone on this shoot was a true collaborator.

Photo by Dawndra Budd
https://www.portraitsbydawndra.com/

 I have had the privilege of watching many artists do their work and I have come to see a tremendous difference between those that control , and those  that collaborate. When one controls they are presenting something that is known and from that space it already has become stale. When you are collaborating you are present to the moment and everything becomes alive. Collaborating though  takes tremendous courage, vulnerability and risk. You cannot protect yourself or your ego, there is nothing to hide from - you just must show up, be present and respond honestly.

I can't say that I'm always full of collaboration and I am certain there many times I'm trapped in control -out of my own fear. I am practicing and learning everyday to be present, to show up to collaborate with all of life around me and to be receptive and open to the field of the unknown.  It's where all the magic happens. 

Do your problems feel too big?

     There's something I've been realizing recently, we humans LOVE problems and we love to make them big! Sometimes it's almost like it gives us something to do in this weird western world, life has gotten too easy. When my problems seem too big, I tell myself that my life has become too small. Instead of focusing on the largeness of the challenge I want to focus on the largeness of the possibility or opportunity for change coming my way, and of existence as a whole.

Gothic Basin
Photo by Valera Vulfson

    It's easy for problems to feel big when we are sitting at our desk looking at our computer. Those problems become sooo much smaller however when we step outside and look at the mountains, or the ocean, or something that is so big and so vast that everything else disappears. I smile when I recognize my smallness in the realm of the universe, it doesn't make me sad -  it excites me. And, much like watching ants marching around on an ant hill I'm reminded of the divine unseen order of things. My job is to get in flow, do my best, and let go and that's it.

    So next time a challenge or a daunting task comes your way, when the emotional pain seems way bigger than you could ever handle.... Step outside and remind yourself of your smallness in the big cosmic universe, and this problem too will find its way like bees find their way back to the hive. Make your life bigger and bigger every day and I promise you every little challenge will get smaller and smaller. And then your old habit of being drawn to the small and mundane problems will start to disappear because you will be more drawn to the excitement and challenge of this big wonderful Journey. Don't make your problems too big, make your life HUGE and all your problems will get a little easier, and a lot smaller.

Do you have Artist?

My name is Simone Bruyere Fraser, and I have Artist. I think I was first diagnosed with Artist around 11 or 12, but I showed symptoms of it as early as four years old. The hours of make believe in the backyard, the dress up costumes, the stories, the shows I'd put on, dances I made up. A lot of this could be chalked up to normal child behavior but when I was 11 or 12, I started showing serious symptoms. I would give up entire summers when other children were playing at the beach or going to gymnastics camp to write plays which I would then cast, act, direct, make sets, costumes, and write songs for. My parents were supportive, but I also think they thought it was something I wouldn't necessarily do my whole life. A funny childhood passion. I was good with many things social work, animals, communications, business. I could have done anything.

Photo by Allen Wyler

 It is believed that some of the factors that indicate if someone has artist is in their genes. Neither of my parents were artists, I thought I was immune, I too thought perhaps it was a childhood curiosity I would grow out of. But I came to realize later that both of my parents have very strong recessive artist jeans that came together to make me a full-blown artist. I should have seen the signs all along. There was that novel my dad was always talking about writing about his time as a parole officer, his fascination with Italian art, and then when certain music came on he would erupt into dancing that was exceptionally good for an older white man - everyone commented on it. And there was my mother, who I was told when she spoke globally at conferences lit up like a Christmas tree when she was on stage and her pointing at the slides looked more like enthusiastic jazz hands, she would dress in the appropriate wardrobe/costume of the country. I always knew when she would be speaking with a colleague from overseas because she would take on their specific dialect, even though she was on the phone with them from our living room. Whenever she had two seconds to draw with me when I was little she would draw unbelievable horses that looked like they could run right off the page. 

Why do I feel the need to talk about this now, because it is clear to me that I will live with artist for the rest of my life. There are times I thought that I would outgrow it, there are times I have tried to suppress the symptoms hoping that I would forget about them, and there are times that I have tried to cure it. But the truth is artist will not go away, I was born with it. Some of the symptoms of artist are very challenging and I think can leave many people who do not know about it, or who are close to someone with Artist both confused and perplexed. It can equally be just as confusing for the person living with it. I would like to bring more awareness about artist to our world and so I would like to share some of the major symptoms and common concerns/traits so that you may be aware of them when dealing with people who have artist.

Every story that you may tell them, every experience that they may have is the possibility of a great piece of art in the making. It is very common for them to blurt out, that would make a great movie after you have shared with them some treacherous story about your life. Do not take it personally, they still care they just can't help it. Similarly every person they meet becomes a character study. They watch with tremendous detail the way people walk talk and gesture. It is not uncommon for them to go home and try to mimic these things in the mirror. It is also common for artists to hop between different creative genres and often at a moment's notice. For example for someone who has spent years doing opera singing suddenly to think they are a genius photographer as well. They can't help it they think that artist relates to all creative genres, often disregarding the unique craft with each art. People with artist can have unusual eating and sleeping patterns. For example sometimes in the middle of eating a fruit salad they may look at a kiwi-fruit as if they have never seen one before in their life and then in the middle of eating bring the kiwi into the light and have an incredible urge to paint it with oil paints on a large canvas. Sleep can also offend be disrupted as artist symptoms seem to worsen between the hours of 2 and 4am. Some of their most flamboyant creations will come out at this time whether it be music, monologues, dances, or paintings. While others may tell them to go to bed they often believe that if they do not do it right at that moment all will be lost. The inspiration is no less than a direct connection to the divine and they are the only porthole to be able to transport it into the living realm to save humanity with this masterpiece. Another symptom of artist is that anything they see - they could believe they can make themselves. They go to Ikea and see shelves and believe that if they go home and also take some wood and nails they can make the same shelf, only better. It is the same with greeting cards, clothing, home decor, acting, dancing, and anything alike. Unfortunately often this is not the case and leads to some disastrous and dangerous circumstances for themselves and others. 

People with artist often struggle around situations of money either having none of it or tremendous amounts of it not knowing what to do with it until they spend it on everything and then have absolutely no money again. Hence the term starving artist as they often will give up everything for their art, and buy fancy Artist supplies instead Artist's paying rent. Artist's tend to struggle with any conventional norms and ask why more often than other people. Why should I get married, why should I buy a house, why should I work a job, there is a piece of their brain that can't compute social convention. Along with not with not Computing social convention they simultaneously over sympathize with others pain. Is very common for people with artist to see them fighting and picketing for different groups often groups that they might not even identify with naturally. Yet they are incredibly impassioned with others causes and feel that it is their obligation to fight for them. People with artist tend to overly resonate with experiences designed for children. If you are at a park and they say you must be below a certain height to go on a ride you will often find artists disregarding these rules and jumping on the ride anyway. Please be wary of inviting Artist's to your child's birthday party. If there are crafts involved they will not be able to withhold them self and they are not good with modeling sharing for the younger children. If they are working on the coloring project they will pick the color they want and use it until they are done and even then they know sharing is a good thing, they will not be able to help them self from finishing what should have been your child's art project. Lastly people with artist many show a strong and widely diverse emotional range that the majority of the population do not show. It is not uncommon to have them laughing hysterically and then if you turn around they may be in the corner crying about something from their childhood.

 Times in my life I was frustrated that I was with artist. I tried to get normal jobs hoping that they would suppress symptoms for a time, I got a Masters in Business and Communications hoping that it would cure or ease artist. It did not. Once when giving a presentation in Business School I stood right in front of the projector light that was projecting our slides to the classroom for the entire speech. I couldn't help but "find my light" and stay in it regardless if it meant the people watching had no visuals for the talk.

My Hope Is that anyone sharing in this will have a benefit in two ways. One is that if you are close to someone or know of someone who is close to someone who has artist, perhaps you can help share these signs and symptoms so they can be more well-informed of what they are dealing with one being close to someone who has artist. And the other is that if you are reading this and you are having an epiphany that you yourself may be have artist I encourage you to love it. I joke, but truly it is the most tremendous of diagnoses. I Have Artist. Embrace it because it gets worse if you suppress the symptoms they must be expressed to keep any semblance of sanity while working with this condition. And, when you do, if you do, you will experience the richest, fullest, wildest, most diverse life ever created. Where would our world be if we did not have artists boldly and honestly going where no man has gone before, and enriching humanity with these these tremendous gifts? The examples in music, dance, writing, painting, sculpture, and acting are countless. I could not be more grateful that I have artist now even on the crazy days. Art comes through the heart, and the world needs much more heart and more art.